Archive for May, 2011

Weeks 18 & 19

It’s been way too long without an update, I know. I’m getting a lot of “more belly pics!” emails, which I can honestly say I don’t get but I love that you care and are interested in me and the babies. 🙂 So without further ado….

Week 18

Week 19

I think in the pics it looks like I haven’t changed much from week 18 to 19, but trust me, the belly is bigger…and bigger…and bigger. Every day I come into work my co-workers marvel at it- “You look bigger than yesterday! How is that possible?!” I don’t know ladies, but it is. It truly has a life of its own.

Overall I’ve been feeling good. Starting to get uncomfortable but the belly band helps with that when I’m working. When I’m sleeping (or rather, attempting to sleep) it’s very hard to find a position that feels good so I often end up on my back which is a no-no. I was a back sleeper pre-babies so it’s a hard habit to break. Trying to switch from side to side throughout the night and if I’m on my back, I try to lean a little one way or the other to avoid my full weight resting on my back. Other than that I just have heartburn and occasional fits of coughing or vomiting but I think that’s just because my organs are running out of room and trying to adjust. Really glad that I’m doing as well as I am in all honesty.  It seems as if my body just keeps going without much trouble and I’m just along for the ride. Here’s hoping for many more weeks like that!

Most importantly, the babies are doing good. They’re measuring big and look strong and healthy on all the scans. I’m very thankful indeed to all of you who have been keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. It really means more than you’ll ever know.

Mr. Wonderful

Today is my husband Jeremy’s birthday. We’ve been together 15 years, married for almost 11 of those years. I thought I’d reflect a little on this man, this Mr. Wonderful, who is now 35.

Jeremy has always been intriguing. I don’t know a better way to describe it. The first time I laid eyes on him he was in the lobby of my dorm in college, talking passionately to a couple of friends about how R rated movies were a gateway into harder things. Ha. Intriguing. He was just over 19 years old then and to know Jeremy now (or anytime since then really) you’d say that doesn’t really fit. But yet there was something about it that still applies. He intrigued me. I thought, “Who is this guy? Does he really believe what he’s saying? He seems like he’s just playing devil’s advocate for the reaction and some laughs…hmm… And what’s that he’s wearing? A white t-shirt tucked into acid wash jeans, black suspenders, a long-sleeved yellow striped shirt worn open, and sneakers? Is he for real?” There was something about him that was so refreshing and appealing yet of course when he noticed me that day I looked away and when he came over to say hello and introduce himself I blew him off. Couldn’t let him see my hand….

Our first date was my 19th birthday, homecoming at Grace College. My parents had already planned on visiting me that weekend so when he asked me I had to tell him they’d be there too. Our first date. With my parents. And he said “sounds good.” Very intriguing… We got some time to ourselves later that night and went to a local restaurant for some pie and coffee. Then (since everything in a small town closes at 9pm) drove around until we saw the one thing that wasn’t closed yet- a grocery store. We just hung out in the parking lot laughing and making up fake conversations about people walking by. It was so lame and non date-ish, that it was quickly becoming the best date I’d ever had. And the most fun. We drove around some more and he started asking me all sorts of personal questions to get to know me. I refused to answer most of them and was appalled that he’d even ask such things of a person he hardly knew, which I think intrigued him. But I liked his boldness as it was so far from how I’d act, and he seemed like an open book, which I’d never been. I wanted to know this person more. I could just tell that this guy could get me into trouble, help me come out of my shell, breathe a little easier. I just really liked him.

We’ve both changed a lot since that first date. We’ve grown up together. I’m a lot less uptight and less worried about doing life as perfectly as possible- no, really. I AM, alright? And Jer’s really into R rated movies, haha. Oh, and he’s matured a bunch too. 😉 We’ve actually been through a lot together over the years. There’s been much love but much heartache too. Intense joy and dark depression. But through it all he’s been my best friend. I think that’s a lot of what’s gotten us through the tough times. We have a deep friendship and we like each other genuinely. Very much. And God has been on our side. To not mention His abiding presence and help in our lives would be a mistake. Our faith has at times sustained us and at other times reinforced how lucky we are that God chose us for each other. It’s taught us to love and to be love to each other and I am so very grateful for that lesson, however hard it was learned.

One thing that hasn’t changed over the years is that Jeremy Bear still intrigues me. Always. Every day. I find him amazing and inspiring and surprising and sometimes even appalling all at once. And I love it. He is hands down the most talented person I know. Unbelievably creative. His drawings seem so effortless, even though I know the years of work behind them. His voice when he speaks is resonant and thoughtful and witty. He is the funniest person I know and as he will tell you I am not a person who laughs at everything- you have to actually be funny! His writing is clear and true and undeniably him. In fact, in everything he does there is a clear voice. A unique style. As unique as that striped yellow shirt and black suspender combo he used to love so much. He is himself; always; and that is the single most intriguing and lovely thing about him.

I am over the moon that this man is the father of my children. No one else would do. These babies need him. They need his nervous energy and shaky hands. They need his witty “rim shot” remarks and less witty grandpa style puns and jokes that make everyone stare awkwardly and then bust out laughing. They need his comforting words when the world is hard. He’s the only one that will know just the right thing to say. They need his warmth and kindness. They need his quick forgiveness and grace when they’ve done something wrong. He’s really good at that and has taught me so much. They need to learn how to draw batman like daddy and all about the strange and wonderful world of comics. Not just the super hero stuff, the nitty-gritty of what makes the illustrated word their daddy’s favorite thing in all the world. They need to know that being weird is good and okay. They need him, Jeremy Bear. He’s going to be the best father I could imagine for our children and I’m so proud and thankful.

I love you Jeremy. I like you too, an awful lot. Thank you for sticking it out and journeying life with me. I think the blessings of that journey will be arriving shortly. If they’re anything like me, they’ll find you very exciting and interesting and indeed intriguing. And they’ll feel very lucky that you were chosen to be their dad. I know I feel lucky to be your wife. Happy 35th.